Anyone who says stuff such as "I am so OCD" when they neatly organize their DVD collection by title, or clean their room so it is nice and organized, or who is bothered by an "unsatisfying video", please take a moment to listen to me.
YOU DO NOT HAVE OCD! True, you may have some Obsessive-Compulsive tendancies. You may like it neat and orderly. But frivolously tossing around the words OCD like it is nothing actually causes stigma against those with the disorder. How? Let me tell you.
When you frivolously toss words like OCD or Bipolar around, you negate the reality of the diseases that millions suffer from. You create an image of the disorder, one that is false, and it becomes what people think of when they think of the disease. Think of OCD. What comes to mind? I bet images of neat and orderly books or a clean house comes to mind. Maybe even hand washing a lot. What does not come to mind is the horrifying intrusive thoughts that precede a compulsive action (called the obsession), nor does the anxiety and terror come to mind. Nor does the complete compulsion to do something repeatedly that you in no way can control.
Here is an example. I came home from my therapist's office to find blood on the bottoms of both the outside doors. My OCD stems from fears of contamination. I seen that and I froze. I began to panic. My mind whirled with thoughts of HIV and dying of AIDS. Logically I know that HIV doesn't live long at all outside of the body. I also know that if you do not touch it you have zero risk. But logic doesn't help OCD.
I became a prisoner in my mind. I got in my home, and the rituals began full force. Washing. Sanitizing. I put bleach on my shoes. I threw away my food I bought even if it was in a bag and in no way touched the ground. I scrubbed my floors and doors. Then I went into full blown OCD mode. The fight within my brain to stop the rituals caused me to be unable to leave the bed for four days. I was terrified to leave my clean house. I ate two chicken strips and a cup of Mac n cheese that entire time. The thoughts of disease and contamination screwed up my brain so bad I couldn't talk, or do anything but wash things. It was horrific. I had to fight my brain to not be terrified to leave my house even after it was sanitized of the blood outside. I still am unsure if I will win that fight but I hope to.
I know this sounds crazy, and it is. But that is the nature of the disease. It is insidious and hides just waiting to get you. A drop of blood. A sneeze. A thought. Anything can become a trigger for an OCD flare. And my contamination fears are not the only kinds of things OCD can cause. Others have fears of words or places, rituals around numbers, sex, violence, religion. Literally anything can be ruined by OCD. It is like living in your own personal hell. A prison that you can not escape. An anxiety induced void that leaves you drained, depressed, and terrified.
So when I say please stop trivializing my disease with quips and quizzes, it is not to be mean. It is because we really need more awareness and education on the disease. You wouldn't share a quiz called "what kind of cancer are you"? Or say "I got a cold must be my AIDS!" So why trivialize OCD?
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